Breakups are painful, but everyone eventually reenters the dating scene with renewed hope of finding a great partner. You may feel nervous about getting back out there. It’s challenging to feel confident about the dating world when you’ve had one or more bad experiences. Here are some effective strategies to boost your confidence and help you figure out the next best steps for your love life.
How to Get Into the Dating Scene
Dating seems much more intimidating if you can’t visualize how you’ll meet people. Give yourself more confidence in the near future by thinking about how to get into the dating scene in ways that make you feel most comfortable.
Let Your Loved Ones Make Recommendations
Watching a stranger turn into your partner takes time. If you’re nervous about investing that time into someone you don’t know, let your loved ones know you’re open to introductions. As you learn how to get into the dating scene, don’t forget that meeting someone through friends or family members can spark some of life’s greatest romances.
Try Dating Websites or Apps
Dating apps might not be your first choice, but 53% of online dating app users have had a positive experience, with 42% of users saying that it has made it easier to search for a long-term partner. Although you might hesitate to download them, keep them as a potential option. You never know who might join a dating website or app that you haven’t swiped past before.
Visit a Speed Dating Event
People host speed dating events in most major cities. See if there’s one near your hometown. You won’t feel the pressure of having a lengthy conversation over dinner just to meet new people and discover if there’s a spark. It could also be a fun way to shake up your dating life.
Start Volunteering Around Town
If you love serving your community, you might meet a partner while volunteering for a cause. It may even become your newest idea for reconnecting with potential partners when first dates go really well. You’ll throw yourself into a new setting together, which might make you more inclined to plan a second date.
Join a Hobby Club
People start clubs for all kinds of hobbies. Invest in your passions by joining a local group that meets to go kayaking, knit sweaters or practice their trivia skills. You’ll make new friends and potentially find your future partner without the pressure of going on traditional first dates.
6 Tips to Improve Your Self-Confidence While Finding a Partner
After you’ve thought about how you’d like to reenter the dating scene, give yourself a confidence boost with some lifestyle changes. You’ll feel grounded in your identity and comfortable in your skin, which makes first dates much easier to manage.
1. Practice Positive Affirmations
Everyone has a few negative thoughts about themselves occasionally. If those thoughts become an everyday experience, they could dictate your self-esteem. Try practicing positive affirmations in the mirror every day. They’ll improve your self-esteem and general well-being by teaching your brain how to believe in yourself again.
2. Explore Your Identity
You’re starting a new chapter of your life, which means you might feel better after a personal refresh. Treat yourself to some new clothes or a different hairstyle. See which aesthetic fits you while you’re defining your identity outside of your relationship. Even something as simple as a new set of specs can give you newfound confidence. Get a pair that works with your face shape and other features, such as the distance between your pupils.
3. Meet With a Therapist
It’s all too easy to blame yourself for past breakups. If you’ve had a lifetime of self-criticism, it could hold you back from self-growth or healthy отношения. Try talking with a therapist about what happened with your last partner and your personal history. Cognitive behavioral therapy effectively treats depression and increases self-esteem after a breakup, but it’s not your only option.
A therapist will spend your sessions discussing the internal blocks holding you back from greater self-esteem. You might even recognize red flags you missed that you can avoid the next time you start dating.
4. Reframe Your Perspective on Rejection
Rejection is painful. Whether it happens on a first date or after a long relationship, it can leave you feeling hurt. The best way to reenter the dating scene with confidence is to reframe how you view future rejection. You could work with a therapist to talk about how it affected you in the past before choosing how you’ll look at it in the coming years.
Rejection could mean you’re entering a new path, learning a valuable lesson or entering a period of self-growth. You’ll find the best definition for your healing process with guidance from a licensed mental health counselor and time for internal reflection.
5. Develop a New Skill While You Date
If you start gaining confidence in a hobby, you’ll build your self-esteem. Engaging in hobbies makes people happier across cultures and continents. Show yourself how you can accomplish anything you put your mind to. While you stay busy with your painting, gardening or crocheting, you’ll also avoid making the dating scene the most important thing in your life.
You could even make nature walks your new hobby if you’re not interested in an art form. Researchers found that spending just two hours per week in nature decreases anxiety levels. As long as your new skills make you feel relaxed and confident, you’ve found a great hobby.
6. Choose Healthy Boundaries for Yourself
You’ll need healthy boundaries to make a relationship work, no matter who you date. Think about which boundaries you’ve needed in non-romantic relationships or which ones you’d like to set for yourself. There are six types of boundaries every person can benefit from:
- Physical: Feeling physically safe and at ease
- Emotional: Protecting or prioritizing your emotional well-being
- Sexual: Prioritizes or protects your sexual needs
- Material: Drawing a hard line around your personal belongings
- Workplace: Setting a healthy limit to how much energy you put into your career
- Time: Recognizing how to use your time to care for your physical, mental and emotional health while pursuing your goals
A therapist can also help you identify boundaries that would improve your life. When you recognize better ways to protect your mental and physical well-being, you’ll foster healthier relationships and feel more confident about the type of love you deserve.
Get Back Into the Dating Scene With More Confidence
Try keeping notes while you learn how to be confident in dating. There are many things you can try to boost your self-esteem. If you give yourself time to heal and grow, you’ll start dating again with renewed strength that attracts equally great people.