Everyone has those moments when they’re asked to complete a task they’re not enthusiastic about. Whether helping out with a campaign or going to a public event, it’s quite a universal experience to feel that urge to decline. Some people say “yes” out of guilt or pressure. However, others answer “no” with confidence instead.
It’s empowering to express what you want. Here’s a deeper look at how it can build your self-esteem and how you can say “no” confidently in the future.
Jak mówienie "nie" może ci pomóc?
Learning to say “no” confidently can help you set boundaries in your relacje, whether it’s with work, family or friendships. Many people tend to take advantage of people-pleasing traits, thinking their requests will never be declined. Saying “no” is a way to showcase love and importance to yourself over others.
Saying “no” is also a chance to accomplish what you want. Other people’s pleas are a hindrance to a resolution you have. To reach a goal, you need to practice discipline. Declining recognizes that drive and maintains progress.
It’s natural to feel an obligation to agree right away. A 2022 survey from the Thriving Center of Psychology found that 58% Amerykanów zmaga się z z odmawianiem innym. Musisz jednak ominąć rozczarowanie i nauczyć się być asertywnym w kwestii tego, czego pragniesz. Jeśli chcesz odrzucać prośby i zaproszenia, korzystaj ze swojej wolności.
Jak pewnie mówić "nie"
It’s natural to shy away from turning down people, especially if it’s a family or friend. However, it’s essential to put yourself first at times. Here’s a guide on how to say “no” confidently.
1. Zawsze się komunikuj
For most people, silence always means yes. Some people who know you well may be able to read your thought process and predict whether you will say “no” or not. However, if you’re talking with someone newer in your life, they can’t make those calls.
Avoid thinking that they can assume your answer. The first step to a confident “no” is to blurt it out. Whether through a text message, a call, or a face-to-face conversation, a simple “no, thank you” is more powerful than you think.
2. Sprawdź swój ton
Ton jest czynnikiem definiującym między pewnością siebie a arogancją. Zmiana tonu może być trudniejsza podczas korzystania z czatów tekstowych, ale inne wskazówki, takie jak znaki interpunkcyjne, dodatkowe słowa i emotikony, mogą złagodzić ton.
Try to alter your way of speaking in in-person conversations. It’s easy to get carried away, especially when you feel a strong urge to turn down a request immediately. You może ćwiczyć spokojne mówienie zamiast się złościć. Uśmiech może również złagodzić napięcie.
3. Potwierdź swoje powody
There are moments when you initially say “no” and allow yourself to get swayed into answering “yes” instead. There’s nothing wrong with caving, especially when the other person made a good point. However, you need to make sure you’re making that decision.
Try to reevaluate why you said “no” in the first place. For example, someone asked you to get lunch with them. You initially declined because you wanted to save up money. If they offer to pay for your meal, it’s more than okay to say “yes” instead.
4. Stand Your Ground
If you have strong reasons to say “no”, don’t be afraid to stand your ground. Some people może przejawiać zachowania pasywno-agresywne kiedy mówisz "nie", jako formę presji ze strony rówieśników. Odpowiadaj spokojnie i powtarzaj to, co powiedziałeś.
Na przykład, szef może poprosić cię o podjęcie się dodatkowego projektu. Możesz odmówić, ponieważ nadal masz wiele innych do wykonania. Jeśli odpowie negatywnie, powtórz, że nie możesz zaakceptować projektu ze względu na inne obowiązki.
5. Ćwicz uczciwość
Another way to say “no” confidently is to be more honest. Sharing extra information about the rejection is a great way to justify your answer. It also prompts others to be a little more understanding.
For example, you’re in a social event where people are drinking. If anyone offers a drink, you can otwarcie opowiadać o swojej drodze do zdrowia as you turn it down. Remember that you only have to share what you’re comfortable with.
6. Pozbądź się poczucia winy
Answering “no” is a great way to build up your self-esteem, but it’s understandable to feel a wave of guilt when you first start using it. Try to evaluate your emotions. The word “no” should not be bringing out negative emotions.
When you decline an offer, you aren’t a bad person. Rather, you’re someone who understands how valuable your time and effort are. There are also times when the circumstances simply can’t let you commit. Show yourself some love and say “no.”
Bonus: Powiedz "tak" innym rzeczom
Saying “no” confidently can be the end of things. However, you can also say yes to other things as well. Compromise is a way w celu wyrównania różnic and meet each other’s needs. Rather than fulfilling only theirs, you can bring yours into the mix and work it out.
Na przykład rodzice chcą wyjechać na wakacje poza granice kraju. Jeśli boisz się latać, musisz nauczyć się odpowiadać "nie". Po wyjaśnieniu dlaczego, możesz zasugerować, by zamiast tego wybrać się na rejs. To rozwiązanie pozwoli całej rodzinie wybrać się na wielką wycieczkę, jednocześnie biorąc pod uwagę twoje obawy.
Mów "nie" z pewnością siebie
Figuring out how to say “no” confidently can take some time, especially for more soft-spoken people. That said, it is quite an asset to showcase assertiveness. Follow the tips above and put yourself first!